It's only gross if you're ugly

As written is previous posts, I kinda want sex. But there's a problem, anyone who would be attracted to this old, obese woman is probably a troll. As I age I find my options are quite limited. Without going back and retreading a former rant I'll leave it at that.

So what does a horny soul do with so few options? After all I can pick and choose in my dreams. But what about those moments when I can't control my dreams or I have to be conscious? Do I collect images of men and get my vibrator out and just shake myself into oblivion?

I remember a movie I saw in the 80's called "chatterbox" about a woman's vajajay that was quite vocal and got the young woman into all sorts of trouble. Poor retch. But I can relate. It's getting vocal down there.

It was so much safer to stay in a self imposed celibacy, not thinking or feeling about the carnal joy ride. And yet, I feel so much more alive. And relating to men in a "what might happen" sort of way is fun.

And yet I can't see myself doing the two headed dance until I loose about 100 pounds. Boy, talk about extended foreplay.