And yet this cannot continue. Things are piling up around my ears. If I don't stop procrastinating I will drop into the much scarier world of hoarding.
The prospect of becoming a hoarder has made me more aware of my bad habit of putting everything off. It's a vicious cycle. There is something that is so sad about hoarders. And yet, I am beginning to understand the illness.
It springs from the feeling of "not enough." I can understand the feeling of not enough. I come from that family. I was conditioned to believe there was not enough from an early age. My mother confided in me as a child. "Where are we going to get the money for...?" was a familiar theme. And then she would lite another cigarette.
As an adult, I function under the prospect of not enough. There certainly is not enough money to last a month. And from that, all else springs. With that in mind, I tend to hold onto things I may need in the future. The thing is, I never seem to need exactly what I save.
Now is the time to take that leap of faith. I can let go of some of my unused items. I will be able to provide everything I need. And I have everything I need right now, in this moment.
And so a new goal is born -- winter cleaning!
